Another day, another attack on the so-called Chelsea tractor. But Gordon Brown's grotesque vendetta against this much maligned vehicle won't stop me driving mine. If anything, I've a damn good mind to polish up my bull-bars and ram down the Downing Street gates, just to park it on his doorstep.

Why? Because were it not for such pontificating lefties, then Diana, our princess of hearts would be standing here today – saying the same thing – instead of turning in her grave at this political poppycock, literally a victim of political correctness in the form of your common or garden saloon car.

Furthermore, like many parents, I have a daughter. And like these millions of mothers and fathers, the last thing I want is for my daughter to be casually mown down by asylum seekers driving without insurance, and worse still, without even being able to speak the Queen's English.

But how can we bring an end to this world gone mad? Simple. We roll out biometric ID cards now. How else can we expect to stem this tsunami of clandestine immigration, which does nothing for our country but increase unemployment and damage our house prices. Is it any wonder that our cricket team is always losing?

If our democratically elected government is so happy to compromise such self-evident human rights as what we choose to drive, then how long is it before Brussels replaces our Pound with their Euro? From there, it's only a small step before the European Union demands our Queen's head on a platter.

And with our military reputation in tatters thanks to those so-called British sailors in Iran, the government will give in – without a second's hesitation. How much longer can it be before the Argies are invading the Falklands once more?

Is this why our forefathers fought two world wars? I think not.